A Lot Of Funny Quotes
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A Lot Of Funny Quotes & Sayings
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Old age is - a lot of crossed off names in an address book.
— Ronald Blythe
That's something a lot of folks don't know about me - I'm pretty darn funny.
— Michael Jai White
I think I got a lot of my 'funny' DNA from my mother, who had a glorious sense of the ridiculous.
— Christopher Buckley
As I may or may not say to the Lord on Judgment Day, "You ask a lot of questions for someone who has so much explaining to do"
— Robert Breault
My gramps is a lot like you. No sense of adventure. All he does is sit in his urn...
— Cleo Peitsche
I spend a lot of time thinking about what I do and how it fits into the scheme of things. I won't do something just because it's funny.
— Joel Hodgson
Onions make me sad. A lot of people don't realize that.
— Mitch Hedberg
![A Lot Of Funny Quotes By Adrienne Wilder: [the car] backfired a lot. Loud enough that](https://www.wisefamousquotes.com/images/a-lot-of-funny-quotes-by-adrienne-wilder-151503.jpg "A Lot Of Funny Quotes By Adrienne Wilder: [the car] backfired a lot. Loud enough that")
[the car] backfired a lot. Loud enough that when I drove in the wrong part of town and it let loose with a gas fart, people actually ducked for cover.
— Adrienne Wilder
I tend to head for what's amusing because a lot of things aren't happy. But usually you can find a funny side to practically anything.
— Maggie Smith
God writes a lot of comedy ... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.
— Garrison Keillor
Even though I do a more traditional type of being funny on television, I still know a lot of comedians and stand-ups and improv actors.
— Busy Philipps
I'm doing what I love, and then I get months and months of rest. I have a lot of money for a 21-year old. I can't stand it when actors complain.
— Jennifer Lawrence
A lot of funny stuff happens in Canada.
— Samantha Bee
We still have a lot to talk about," I said. "Talk?" He shook his head, his eyes full of desire. Kiss, he whispered to my thoughts.
— Becca Fitzpatrick
There's been a lot of coming home in the early mornings after funny nights out, having bizarre sandwiches in bed.
— Neneh Cherry
I discovered that funny animal pictures - memes - would get a lot of likes and shares.
— George Takei
What I actually want to call you is a hell of a lot more unprintable than your name
— Cassandra Clare
A lot of my early pictures are, I think, quite funny. And these days I tend to look for comedy more and more.
— Helen Levitt
There's a lot of pretty funny women out there.
— Chelsea Handler
There are a lot of really funny guys who are very natural in what they do: Jonah Hill, Michael Cera, Seth Rogen.
— Will Ferrell
You'll see a lot of funny stuff, you'll see a lot of daddy-knows-best stuff, you'll see a lot of me and my wife trying to hold the family together.
— Russell Simmons
I read a lot of scripts that I just don't find very funny.
— Jennifer Aniston
I don't smoke a lot of pot anymore. No one wants to hang around a guy who ends every sentence with, "Do you guys hate me?"
— Mike Birbiglia
It's funny: There's a lot of comics on 'Breaking Bad.'
— Steven Michael Quezada
I think that the anti-Microsoft sentiment is simply due to their having been so successful selling a lot of crap.
— Steve Wozniak
We might make a lot of money but, we also spend a lot of money.
— Patrick Ewing
I love a lot of comedy actors and actresses like Kristen Wiig and Tina Fey and all those women who are really brilliant and funny.
— Saoirse Ronan
A man's got to take a lot of punishment to write a really funny book.
— Ernest Hemingway,
It's funny, don't you think, how time seems to do a lot of things? It flies, it tells, and worst of all, it runs out.
— Markus Zusak
A lot of people don't think of my work as being all that funny, but I think it's hilarious!
— Fred Tomaselli
I'm also not very analytical. You know I don't spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things
— George W. Bush
Twitter's a lot of work! That's the first thing I would say. There's so much pressure to be funny.
— Ari Graynor
Neither of them had kissed someone else in a while, but it didn't much matter. Kissing's a lot like laughing. If the joke's funny, it doesn't matter
— Maggie Stiefvater
I had to take a physical to do this show. They had a lot of weird questions like, "Have you ever tried sugar or PCP?"
— Mitch Hedberg
I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort.
— Zach Galifianakis
Being nice can be funny. A lot of my jokes are like, 'Let me take a bad situation and try to put the best spin on it.'
— Ron Funches
When there's time for whistling, there's a lot of time on a show.
— Ellen DeGeneres
I have a lot of funny friends, and we joke a lot, but I've never really played comedic parts.
— Joel Kinnaman
What I like about the jokes, to me it's a lot of logic, no matter how crazy they are. It has to make absolute sense, or it won't be funny.
— Steven Wright
A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could have only one book, what would it be? I always say, How to Build a Boat.
— Stephen Wright
A lot of times, as a clown, you find acting for a reason. It's a way to exercise yourself. If you're funny, you test yourself.
— Matthew Lillard
When you're given the gift of truth, you spend a lot of time trying to tone it down because it is already offensive enough.
— Shannon L. Alder
'Married with Children' was racy. It was sexist. It was a lot of things, but mostly it was funny.
— Katey Sagal
![A Lot Of Funny Quotes By Groucho Marx: [Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart.](https://www.wisefamousquotes.com/images/a-lot-of-funny-quotes-by-groucho-marx-353774.jpg "A Lot Of Funny Quotes By Groucho Marx: [Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart.")
[Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart. [Groucho]: A lot of good that'll do him. He's still got the same face.
— Groucho Marx
I like to have fun, but I don't think of myself as being funny. But I'm a big jokester, so I make fun of myself a lot!
— Taylor Lautner
A lot of the things I say I'm just trying to be funny ... I don't really mean everything I say, because I'm not totally that airhead.
— Paris Hilton
I do try to compress a lot of information into what I do. It's funny.
— Robert Sikoryak
There's a lot of guy comics who I think are funny, but I generally am more excited about a special or a show where there are females.
— Margaret Cho
I know a lot of funny people in a lot of funny places.
— John Mellencamp
I hope they make a show like M*A*S*H, which dealt with a lot of difficult subject matter but was very funny.
— Joan Severance
It's really easy to be funny. You get a lot of funny people in a room, the show is funny.
— Jill Soloway
A funny yet interesting read, Will Self knowa his stuff and must do a lot of deep research.
— Will Self
In a man, I like funny guys. A guy who doesn't have a lot of therapy, who's mature. A man, not a boy.
— Maura Tierney
Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.
— George W. Bush
That's what I hate about a lot of comedies, when you're hitting a line or making it funny.
— Jennifer Aniston
Time has that funny way of smoothing out the rough edges of things, even ones that hurt a little bit. Or a lot.
— Megan Hart
while there's a lot that I don't know about the world, I do know that kids have a funny way of helping you keep things in perspective.
— Nicholas Sparks
There's a lot of very funny people I'd love to work with that I've never met, of course. I love Steve Martin and Jim Carrey.
— Dick Van Dyke
Size does matter. There's a lot of ways to make people feel good, but personally I think it does enhance things.
— Pamela Anderson
The funny thing about writing is I think a lot of people assume that you're sitting in a garret with a quill pen for hour after hour.
— Lincoln Child
I think a lot of stuff I find funny is from day dreaming.
— Demetri Martin
In Italy, I had an Afro, and a lot of the kids came up and felt my hair. It really was funny. I wish I had understood Italian.
— Sugar Ray Leonard
Yeah, I think there are a lot of things about Cleveland that I miss. Los Angeles is a funny place to live.
— Monica Potter
A lot of people like cats. Take the Pope, for example: I read recently that he was a cat-oholic!
— Milton Jones
What's politically correct a lot of times is not funny.
— Denis Leary
Presents? We already bought you a lot of things. Member when we were at the market and I bought you gum? You'member.
— George Lopez
Kippers : fish that like a lot of sleep.
— Chic Murray
I've done a lot of Fox shows since then - Married with Children, Living Single and a whole bunch of other Fox things.
— Gilbert Gottfried
We got a lot of politicians up there on Capital Hill. Ain't it funny how they prosper while the country stands still?
— Waylon Jennings
Lot of ugly funny dudes end up with some pretty gorgeous women. Women are much deeper than us in choosing a mate - they see in the long term.
— Patton Oswalt
Getting married is a lot like getting into a tub of hot water. After you get used to it, it ain't so hot.
— Minnie Pearl
What a lot of funny people it does take to make a world.
— Agatha Christie