Amy Schumer Quotes
Collection of top 58 famous quotes about Amy Schumer
Amy Schumer Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Amy Schumer quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
It's relaxing sometimes, just being human.
— Amy Schumer
I don't know how introverts survived without the Internet. Or with the Internet. Actually, I don't know how we survive at all. It feels impossible.
— Amy Schumer
Don't feel bad for me. I think I'm, like, so pretty.
— Amy Schumer
Focus on your own goals and how to achieve them. No one took your spot, there's room for all of us.
— Amy Schumer
I always did plays, I got the comedic roles in college ... or, uh, the ones that would get naked.
— Amy Schumer
We all accept too easily that life has to be hard and forget to make sure we have the most fun we can.
— Amy Schumer
He was really into family ... He'd never come on the road with me on the weekends 'cause he wanted to spend time with his wife.
— Amy Schumer
I've always been really dark, and drawn to darker humor. Nothing has been forced, and I don't say anything for shock value.
— Amy Schumer
I completely identify as female, believe it or not.
— Amy Schumer
You shoot saltwater in your ass?
— Amy Schumer
The saddest revelation I've had in my life is that my parents are people. Sad, human people.
— Amy Schumer
I'll never forget how she told us. She took us all out to brunch, and she was like, 'You guys, I'm keeping this one.'
— Amy Schumer
My hustle has often involved food, because, much like household pets or toddlers, I am food-motivated, which is a handy thing to know about me.
— Amy Schumer
I'm glad I struggled. I think I'd be an asshole if my money were anything other than the "new" kind.
— Amy Schumer
To me, feminism means equality between men and women. I want to make people laugh and also point out some injustices or inequalities I see.
— Amy Schumer
I am crushing so hard on Amy Schumer. Women like her who have chosen to stand up for themselves and face the bullies are being so embraced.
— Anne Hathaway
Isn't it funny that they say most girls have daddy issues, when really, every dude does?
— Amy Schumer
I am not special just because I'm famous right now.
— Amy Schumer
He presented to the world the facade of a certain kind of man who wasn't really there.
— Amy Schumer
You know what the worst part about my drinking is? When I'm drunk I slur. You know, like I say racial slurs. Wow, nobody likes that at a barbeque.
— Amy Schumer
I say if I'm beautiful. I say if I'm strong. You will not determine my story - I will.
— Amy Schumer
Nothing good ever happens in a blackout. I've never woken up and been like, 'What is this Pilates mat doing out?'
— Amy Schumer
Seeing the people I love happy. 4.
— Amy Schumer
The moments that make life worth living are when things are at their worst and you find a way to laugh.
— Amy Schumer
I feel very comfortable in my own skin. When someone makes jokes about me being heavy, it makes me mad. It's not true. I'm right where I should be.
— Amy Schumer
I feel very open with people, and I'm good at disarming them and having conversations.
— Amy Schumer
The way that these girls keep themselves skinny is awful, isn't it? By vomiting or using hard drugs - which I can't afford.
— Amy Schumer
It's a weird age. They're like, 'Amy, I'm pregnant.' And I still don't know whether to be like, 'Congratulations,' or 'Do you need a ride?
— Amy Schumer
I want to keep working really hard at getting better at stand-up and touring, and I can't imagine a time when I won't want to do that. But, who knows?
— Amy Schumer
First of all, nobody can be innocent and wise at the same time. That's another one of those impossible combinations.
— Amy Schumer
We had to break up, though. We wanted different things - like he wanted kids and I wanted him to hear.
— Amy Schumer
I asked for a glass of Chardonnay. And in a 9/11-like twist, they didn't have any. They offered me Pinot.
— Amy Schumer
I only met Joan Rivers once. But when she passed away, it felt like a part of me went away, too.
— Amy Schumer
It's hard out there for a fuzzy little introvert.
— Amy Schumer
tactics for negotiating with adults. I came on pretty strong at my friends' houses because
— Amy Schumer
I've got a terrible person in me just as much as anybody else, and I think - I like to think I also have a really good person in me.
— Amy Schumer
The saddest realization I've had in my life is that my parents are people. Sad, human people. I aged a decade in that moment.
— Amy Schumer
I am not who I sleep with. I am not my weight. I am not my mother. I am myself. And I am all of you, and I thank you.
— Amy Schumer
I hope that the next time you go to a concert, the band doesn't play the song you wanna hear! And instead, they just play songs off their new album!
— Amy Schumer
The last couple of roles I missed out on went to Jennifer Hudson, Jessica Biel and Olivia Wilde.
— Amy Schumer
Want me to Stevie Wonder my way to the bathroom?
— Amy Schumer
I'm still proud of a lot of my jokes when I started.
— Amy Schumer
I am a hot-blooded fire and I am fearless.
— Amy Schumer