Father Funny Quotes
Collection of top 45 famous quotes about Father Funny
Father Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Father Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
My father only hit me once, but he used a Volvo.
— Bob Monkhouse
Love is a damage
made to the heart,
violence,
fate thats written,
Changeable by distance,
Breakable by time ... ! — Honey Father
made to the heart,
violence,
fate thats written,
Changeable by distance,
Breakable by time ... ! — Honey Father
I come from a stupid family. My father worked in a bank. They caught him stealing pens.
— Rodney Dangerfield
When I was born I brought no joy, my father said he wanted a boy!
— Rodney Dangerfield
What'd did I tell you?" muttered Adrian. He has no fuzzy affection for his father. "De-lightful.
— Richelle Mead
My father was funnier than me. My father was Richard Pryor-funny. I'm just a better businessman.
— Tracy Morgan
Mother, you have my father much offended.
— William Shakespeare
My father tried to give me the sex talk once, and he chickened out. He walked into my room and went, 'Adam - uh, don't kiss guys.'
— Adam Ferrara
My father taught me a good lesson: Don't get to low when things go wrong. And don't get too high when things are good.
— Robert Parish
I was a little bit ashamed of American TV because I thought, 'None of the shows my father works on are as funny as my father.'
— Joss Whedon
My father was a simple man; my mother was a simple woman; you see the result standing in front of you, a simpleton.
— Chic Murray
My father chose my name , and my last name was chosen by my ancestors . That's enough, I myself choose my way
— Ali Shariati
My father used to beat me with his belt ... while it was still on him.
— Zach Galifianakis
Every child needs a father. Even if he turns out to be Darth Vader.
— Jackson Radcliffe
"Well," said my aunt, "this is his boy - his son. He would be as like his father as it's possible to be, if he was not so like his mother, too."
— Charles Dickens
At this moment, I know that the answer has to be yes. I am defeated. By my own father. How Darth Vader.
— Denis Markell
I pick up Dylan. He certainly takes after his father: about three-quarters of his body weight seems to be head, and three-quarters of that is ears.
— Ken Jennings
My mother was so house proud that when my father got up to sleepwalk she had the bed made by the time he got back.
— Chic Murray
Our family was nearly torn apart on several occasions by arguments started when the refrigerator door was open for what my father deemed as 'too long.
— Wes Locher
Sheep hurt my father, and through my father, sheep have also hurt me.
— Haruki Murakami
Wasn't it what her father always warned her about? Don't jump off a bridge because a cute guy tells you to?
— Joannah Miley
WHERE IS MY SON?" Uncle Antonio bellows, levelling the two AK-47s he's holding at the lot of us. "Get away from him, you bastards!
— Jessica Khoury
They didn't have to be funny - they were father jokes.
— Terry Pratchett
We sat on the floor for dinner. Ananya's father passed me a banana leaf. I wondered if i had to eat it or wipe my hands with it.
— Chetan Bhagat
My father always used to say, "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger," - 'til the accident.
— Jimmy Carr
I've started looking at my own father a bit funny. He assures me, though, that I really am the son of a Scottish postman.
— Craig Ferguson
Scottish Play Doe was born at 4:13 a.m. on September 6th. The ink was barely dry on his father's new tattoo.
— Adam Rex
The anecdote was funny, but as my father gazed across the river at the university of his youth, his Russian life was in his eyes.
— Paullina Simons
My first film role was a reporter. It's funny, because my father was a news reporter. I always thought there was something strange about that.
— Peter Jacobson
I was raised by just my mom. See, my father died when I was eight years old. At least, that's what he told us in the letter..
— Drew Carey
My father fought in World War I and single-handedly destroyed the Germans' line of communication. He ate their pigeon.
— Frank Carson
The moral equal of our Founding Fathers.
— Ronald Reagan
Better a loving single-parent family than a 'conventional' family where the parents hate each other and the father is a demagogue.
— Moby
Funny thing- Morgenstern's folk's were named Max and Valerie and his father was a doctor.
— William Goldman
The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get.
— Timothy J. Russert
My father was a very funny man, and one of my strongest recollections is hearing him laugh. He didn't like people who had no sense of humour.
— Mike Myers
My mother and father were very strange people. They tried to be funny which is always very sad to me.
— Jonathan Winters
My father was a small claims court jester.
— Steven Wright
I once asked my father for a dollar for the school picnic. He told me how he once killed a grizzly bear with his loose-leaf notebook.
— Bill Cosby