Man Who Funny Quotes
Collection of top 49 famous quotes about Man Who Funny
Man Who Funny Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Man Who Funny quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
I know a guy who had his doctor say, "Take some weight off, go to a health club." The man lost 20 pounds in one week! The machine tore his leg off!
— Henny Youngman
A man always blames the woman who fools him. In the same way he blames the door he walks into in the dark.
— H.L. Mencken
Love's a funny thing, especially with a man who gets paid to put junk in other people's slots. (The Mail Man)
— Andrew Sturm
Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively.
— Laurence J. Peter
Never trust a man who combs his hair straight from his left armpit.
— Alice Roosevelt Longworth
There are a good many fools who call me a friend, and also a good many friends who call me a fool.
— Gilbert K. Chesterton
Never slap a man who is chewing tobacco.
— Will Rogers
Anyone who believes that men are the equal of women has never seen a man trying to wrap a Christmas present.
— Publilius Syrus
A poor creature who has said or done nothing worth a serious man taking the trouble of remembering.
— Thomas Carlyle
Then there was a man who said, 'I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; by then it was too late'
— Oscar Wilde
"You're an old man who dresses like a Hooter's waitress."
— Greg Giraldo
A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.
— George Bernard Shaw
Man who stands on toilet, gets high on pot!
— Katharine Hepburn
An Irishman's wife gave birth to twins. Her husband wanted to know who the other man was.
— Frank Carson
Taxes are paid in the sweat of every man who labors.
— Franklin D. Roosevelt
You cannot really shame a man who sincerely does not care what others think of him.
— Mokokoma Mokhonoana
I'm a bitter, sad, sour young man who makes a career out of hastling people with real careers.
— Steve Martin
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
— Lana Turner
To the man on crutches, dressed in camouflage, who stole my wallet ... you can hide but you can't run.
— Milton Jones
A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money.
— G. Gordon Liddy
You want me to be a man,older than you, who goes by the name of Roullard.
— Wendelin Van Draanen
In a man, I like funny guys. A guy who doesn't have a lot of therapy, who's mature. A man, not a boy.
— Maura Tierney
There once was an old man of Lyme who married three wives at a time when asked, 'Why a third?' he replied 'One's absurd! and bigamy, sir, is a crime!'
— William Cosmo Monkhouse
This is a young man who is only 25, and you have to say, her has answered every question that has ever been asked.
— David Coleman
An ignorant man who is regarded as knowledgeable by people who are more ignorant than him is still ignorant.
— Mokokoma Mokhonoana
You don't want to have to be the man and the woman in the relationship. I always say you want a man who can fix the toilet.
— Pamela Anderson
Convoy? Michael, you're hanging around with a man who uses a collective term for a single vehicle.
— Steve Coogan
Women who seek advice from single women about getting a man is like asking a homeless man how to be rich.
— Habeeb Akande
Blessed is the man who has found someone to do his work.
— Elbert Hubbard
The man who tries to be funny is lost. To lose one's naturalness is always to lose the sympathy of your audience.
— Harold Lloyd
A man who views the world the same ...
— Muhammad Ali
