Not A Joke Quotes
Collection of top 95 famous quotes about Not A Joke
Not A Joke Quotes & Sayings
Happy to read and share the best inspirational Not A Joke quotes, sayings and quotations on Wise Famous Quotes.
She did not believe that the world was a vale of tears but rather a joke that God had played and that it was idiotic to take it seriously.
— Isabel Allende
Some of them relate to farts but they are not fart jokes. They would just be a fart in the joke but it's about something else ...
— Demetri Martin
Everyone is quiet. Which is the wooooooorst. It's scary when a group of people all know instinctively not to joke around.
— Tina Fey
I've never revved my car at a light for an attractive woman or an auto-rival, not even as a joke.
— Penn Jillette
The best of my songs are more than just a joke. There's something else going on - a character, or it's not just a plain joke.
— Randy Newman
Always warm up the audience with a joke ... If you are not a particularly funny person, make sure that you inform them that it's a joke ...
— Jacob M. Appel
Even one person's misunderstanding [of a blue joke] may not be worth the next guy's laugh.
— Penn Jillette
I can't tell a joke to save my soul. It's just not my thing, though I love to listen to jokes.
— Carol Burnett
The entire Quran is a big joke. If it was not so violent, it would be the biggest comic book ever written.
— Ali Sina
Sometimes in the studio movies I've been working in, you'll put a joke in a movie because the crowd loves it - not because I love it.
— David Gordon Green
Here's a professional tip: If you have to say you're kidding, it might not be a great joke.
— Ellen DeGeneres
I've been paying alimony since I was 14 and child support since 15. That's a joke, but not by much.
— Don Adams
Fuck it ... That's really the attitude that keeps a family together, it's not "we love each other", it's just "fuck it, man.
— Louis C.K.
You are where your brain is but not where a front-page headline is.
— Santosh Kalwar
You do not respond to an attempt on your life with a slap on the hand. Or a joke.
— Cinda Williams Chima
You know where you can shove your joke. Just get me a new drink and try not to include and of your STD-laced body fluid in it this time.
— Kim Harrington
My dear Boris, can you not take a joke?" "Was it a joke?
— Agatha Christie
First of all, Saddam did not win the war, even though he says he did, I mean, you know, that's a joke and everybody in the world knows it.
— Norman Schwarzkopf
I have a really analytical approach to art. And the whole idea that you can't analyze what makes a joke funny ... I do not agree with that at all.
— David Rees
It is the ability to take a joke, not make one, that proves you have a sense of humor.
— Max Eastman
There used to be an old bad joke. I hope it's not so much a good joke anymore. 'Everybody's from Scranton; no one's in Scranton.'
— Joe Biden
I'm not the voice of reason; I'm more the guy using these offensive topics as fodder to raise tension in a joke.
— Anthony Jeselnik
Thou can'st not joke an enemy into a friend,
but thou may'st a friend into an enemy. — Benjamin Franklin
but thou may'st a friend into an enemy. — Benjamin Franklin
Directing a movie is serious, it's not a joke.
— Fred Durst
Don't judge. That was a joke. How could I not? Everyone judged whether we admitted to it or not, usually saving the harshest criticisms for ourselves.
— Donna Augustine
I'm a taker in terms of jokes. I love to hear a good joke, but I don't retain jokes. I'm not a good teller of jokes.
— Steve Carell
In general, I tried not to take myself too seriously - I called myself "the manalyst," after all. My life's motto: Joke 'em if they can't take a fuck.
— Kresley Cole
Joke stealing is a big deal to me, but I mean, I'm not going to investigate it if it doesn't effect me directly.
— Greg Giraldo
I'm not freakishly short. I had, on my show, used shortness as a joke subject; it didn't really bother me.
— Dick Cavett
Not really riding weather, is it, miss? Unless you're a duck." He chuckled at his own joke.
"Quack," Jenna said... — Deborah Blake
"Quack," Jenna said... — Deborah Blake
I'm not even really a joke-teller. I can do ad-lib and banter, but I don't do jokes.
— Bruce Forsyth
Art should be serious, not a joke. I don't like to laugh about art.
— Gerhard Richter
It's not a joke: I really do like being at home.
— Karl Pilkington
Prison is not a joke.
— Emy Storey
If someone wants to make a joke about me smoking too much pot, I'm not going to get mad at them, because I've put it out there that that's what I do.
— Doug Benson
I am so happy that I married a comedy writer. He's never not without a joke. No matter where we are.
— Christa Miller
I rarely joke unless I'm in front of a camera. It's not what I am in real life. It's what I do for a living.
— Christopher Guest
Everything in life is not a joke."
"No, but it mostly is. — Allan Dare Pearce
"No, but it mostly is. — Allan Dare Pearce
I'm not a joke guy; I'm not a stand-up comic.
— Eugene Levy
He was not a practical joke nor was he a fool but he was determinedly original and had a vague and modest idea of himself as a legendary figure.
— John Cheever
We are not engaged in a complicated joke disguised as a religion. We are engaged in a religion disguised as a complicated joke.
— Malaclypse The Younger
It was only a joke, Mia," says Bree gently. "Of course I do not wish that. No one really wishes to be queen.
— Kendare Blake
Never make a person feel, that he/she is very (extra) special.. Cause, then that person starts feeling that 'You' are not worth him/her.
— Honeya
Telling a joke is risk taking. Younger people are more insecure and not willing to put themselves on the line, so a quick one-liner is much safer.
— Robert Orben
Is everything a joke to you?" I asked. He dabbed his tongue to his lip again. "Not everything." "Like what?" "You.
— Becca Fitzpatrick
There is no loneliness more lonely than to be alone in a crowd. No awkwardness more unsettling than the inside joke you do not comprehend.
— Claire North
Dressing is a pleasure; clothes are not a joke.
— Jean Paul Gaultier
John-Paul?" TWO If this is a joke," said Tess, "it's not funny.
— Liane Moriarty
Not that the crew of the Toiletship itself were above a practical joke now and then.
— Thomas Pynchon
Nora & Patch:
N:Is everything a joke to you?
P:Not everything.
N:Like what?
P:You. — Becca Fitzpatrick
N:Is everything a joke to you?
P:Not everything.
N:Like what?
P:You. — Becca Fitzpatrick
I'm not the comedy police, but you watch a movie, and everyone's laughing, and then you shake it out, and you realize, 'There's no joke there!'
— Maria Semple
Some people are so dry that you might soak them in a joke for a month and it would not get through their skins.
— Henry Ward Beecher
If you find you are not understanding my explaination for a joke, hit F5 on your browser and the page will refresh and I will explain it again.
— Ryan North
No, that part's not true! That's a joke-lie. I'm not going to lie to you in this story because I want you to know that the rest of it is true.
— Tina Fey
It's almost a joke how good I am at charades. Not to pat my own back, but I'm literally - I'm kind of unstoppable.
— Wilson Bethel
Be not affronted at a joke. If one throw salt at thee, thou wilt receive no harm, unless thou art raw.
— Oliver Goldsmith
A dirty joke is not, of course, a serious attack on morality, but it is a sort of mental rebellion, a momentary wish that things were otherwise.
— George Orwell
A joke was not a single-use item but something you brought out again and again until it fell apart in your hand like a cheap umbrella.
— David Nicholls
Life is a joke, even though it is not always funny.
— Stephan Attia
I didn't just want to be Frank's daughter who sang Boots. I take my music very seriously and studied very hard. It's not a joke to me.
— Nancy Sinatra
I've always wanted to have a suitcase handcuffed to my wrist. That's not a full joke there! It's filler.
— Mitch Hedberg
Running for me is a sport. It's not a joke. It's serious.
— J. R. Martinez
I thought it would be such a sick joke to have to remain to be alive for decades and not believe in or feel anything.
— Douglas Coupland
Guys will definitely settle for women who get the joke. But a woman who can make you laugh? It's not high on a guy's must list. Perhaps it should be.
— Hank Azaria
I'm not much of a joke writer.
— Ben Falcone
Writing a book has about it some of the anxiety of telling a joke and having to wait several years to know whether or not it was funny.
— Alain De Botton
All life is a jest, Imhotep - and it is death who laughs last. Do you not hear it at every feast? Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you die.
— Agatha Christie
Rachel snatched her hand back. Sorry, I forgot the rules. Everything's a joke until it's not, and words don't mean anything until you want them to.
— Kit Rocha
Completely committed to adapting 'Fifty Shades of Grey'. This is not a joke. Christian Grey and Ana: potentially great cinematic characters.
— Bret Easton Ellis
You make a joke out of everything.
Life's too painful not to. — Richelle Mead
Life's too painful not to. — Richelle Mead
Life is cruel. Love is a joke. And not even death is final.
— Corinne Michaels
No, I will not make out with you." Her red lips curled up. "Did you just try to make a joke, Madam Prosecutor?" I smirked.
— Eliza Lentzski
I think you need to have the guts to not use comedy. Often, the people that work in comedy use a joke to avoid contemplation.
— Steve Coogan
Any so-called leader who does not take this issue (climate change) seriously or treats it like a joke is not fit to lead
— Barack Obama
Why are you making a joke out of this?" she asks.
"Because it's stupid, Nik. There's not even room in my day to think about someone else. — Simone Elkeles
"Because it's stupid, Nik. There's not even room in my day to think about someone else. — Simone Elkeles
Life is a mighty joke that is not meant to be funny.
— Janvier Chouteu-Chando
You can go your whole life and not need math or physics for a minute, but the ability to tell a joke is always handy.
— Garrison Keillor
We claim no respectability. There's no status I would not surrender for a joke. So we don't have to defend anything.
— Stephen Colbert